sexta-feira, 30 de maio de 2008

Assaltante nordestino:
-ei, bichin...isso é um assalto...arriba os braços e num se bula nem faça mugança...arrebola o dinheiro no mato e não faça pantim se não enfio a peixeira no teu bucho e boto teu fato pra fora! perdão, meu Padim Ciço, mas é que tô com uma fome da molestia...
Assaltante mineiro
-ô sô, prestenção...isso é um assalto, uai...levanta os braço e fica quetim quesse trem na minha mão ta cheio de bala...mió passá logo os trocado que eu num tô bão hoje. vai andando, uai! ta esperando o quê, uai!!
Assaltante gaúcho
-o, guri, ficas atento...bah, isso é um assalto...levanta os braços e te aquietas, tchê! não tentes nada e cuidado que esse facão corta uma barbaridade, tchê. passa as pilas pra cá! e te manda a la cria, senão o quarenta e quatro fala.
Assaltante carioca
-seguinte bicho... te deu mal. isso é um assalto. passa a grana e levanta os braços rapá...não fica de bobeira que eu atiro bem pra...vai andando e, se olhar pra tras, vira presunto...
Assaltante baiano
-ô, meu rei...(longa pausa) isso é um assalto...(longa pausa) levanta os braços, mas não se avexe não...(longa pausa) se num quiser nem precisa levantar, pra num ficar cansado...vai passando a grana, bem devagarinho...(longa pausa) num repara se o berro está sem bala, mas é pra não ficar muito pesado...não esquenta, meu irmãozinho(longa pausa) vou deixar teus documentos na encruzilhada...
Assaltante paulista
-orra, meu... isso é um assalto, meu...alevanta os braços, meu...passa a grana logo, meu...mais rapido, meu, que ainda preciso pegar a bilheteria aberta pra comprar o ingresso do jogo do corinthias, meu...pô, se manda, meu..

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